On this perfectly ordinary morning you are Merkel - and you are just a normal bloated man, relieving yourself while watching football on your phone like every other Liverpool fan does. But when a dinosaur rudely slips into your bathroom, you must figure out how to survive its over curious talons; death defying choice by death defying choice.

What is this dinosaur doing here? What fate is worse than dinosaur related death? Who is Stephanie really? Find very little closure on any of these questions in OH NO! THERE'S A DINOSAUR IN YOUR BATHROOM! - a somewhat funny, strange and occasionally sexy text based adventure!

-Discover a sprawling, overwritten story with over twenty different, utterly dreadful endings!

-Find all of the victory endings to unlock the true ending! And these are saved automatically by the way - so you can come back another time to continue your progress. Which is nice. I think we pioneered this saving thing.

-Unearth very little world building lore!

-Struggle in vain to get any real grasp of what is really going on!

-Die many times, often in very strange ways!

Rated 3.9 out of 5 stars
(7 total ratings)
AuthorCrash Triassic
GenreInteractive Fiction, Simulation, Survival
Made withUnity
TagsDating Sim, Dinosaurs, Life Simulation, Meaningful Choices, Text based


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Click download now to get access to the following files:

ONTADIYB - The Game 18 MB
Build May 11th.zip 18 MB


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i got the true ending and it feels bad man.

i can't help but feel bad for merkle, as flawed a human being as he is, does anyone really deserve to live in an endless cycle of either dying to the hands of a dinosaur or having their life ruined by it?

i wish i could just... right off the bat go to the dinosaur and just grab its neck and



omg its funny but i cant seem to win


ez, i won at first time,lucky for a noob don't know to much english


MILD SPOILER ALERT.  There, you've been warned.

Finally got around to playing this, and wow.  The dark humor may be a bit over the top, but for me what really did it was the catastrophic collapse of the fourth wall, and then the wall behind that: the highest moment was easily, "This little endeavor isn't for you.  It's for me"—interestingly on only one path through the true ending, and fortunately the one I chose first.

I'd say this game's deep commentary on our inability to change has given me a lot to think about—enlightened me, even made me a better person—but then, reflecting on its message, I suppose I know better.  We are all Merkle: if you come away from this game thinking you've learned something, you haven't, and yet if you think you haven't, you have.  This game is a koan.


Sorry I'm late.


Hah! Don't worry, I wasn't timing. I'm going to watch some now - I love the kids by the way.


Did not realise the game saved so I went back and did all the other story paths. When's the next game? :)


Hah! Absolutely no idea. I've been thinking through a few different ideas, but no idea when I'll get to them. Ideally they'll come around sooner rather then later though. Some might even follow up this game, in wierd and odd ways.

Not sure which I want more. A sequel or new story!


I recently started to play text games like this (bit wordy but I liked it!) and I am starting to write my own. I was wondering if you used a tool for Unity to make this or if it was made from scratch? I tried Twine but I really like all the music and transition stuff you have here.


Okay, so as far as I can tell there are various ways - and I'm pretty new to this sort of thing. For our project we were working with a coder who was making his own engine and using the game development to develop his own work - I believe we worked in Unity. But honestly, I think with a bit of learning anyone could put together a text adventure in Unity - the 'beta' of this game was originally the product of a C# exercise on a Udemy course I was doing, and getting music and pictures in beyond that shouldn't be much harder. The main issue in doing that is actually getting the right music and art for the game. I hope that was helpful.

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So it sounds like a custom module in Unity then. Ok I'll look at those courses too.

Thank you!


The smartass line and the "haha yeah" line in the true ending are the same. "Then just use your imagination" doesn't make much sense for "haha yeah." Might be a bug, or you were just lazy.

Overall I'd rate the game 4/5.


That is most definately a bug/defect - I'll see if we can't get that sorted out. Thanks for the heads up.

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Quite well written, and it's a heck of a bloody journey, personally felt myself more in shock than leafing most of the time. The ending was a bit frustrating , but it is part of the lesson, so it's good.

As far as suggestions go, having art for the enddings sounds like a great/funny reward (but it's more work).

Check marks for paths already completed kinda sounded like a good suggestion, but since the text pages are so short before options, it feels like marks are unnecessary.

So overall a good experience.

There are certainly improvements I would have liked to make with regards to checking off paths and various other things you mentioned (including in the story). I'm glad you enjoyed it though - hopefully the next one we make will be two or three steps forward.


One Word:


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I'm gonna get that final ending one day.

Edit: Never mind, that day was today. I'mma do another video next week with all the wins.

I would love to see that video. I'm very curious about how people respond to them - as 'diverse' as they are.


Superpowers was the worst to visualize for me. Of the successes, anyway. Dadosaur and Steph was probably the worst overall. Like, I knew there was a possibility of it being in there, although not like that. And not as graphic.

I get it. It's super super dark in places - but I didn't want to be too repetitive about things, so I got 'creative'. With sexy (absolutely not sexy) results!


this game is the best content ive seen in a while

Deleted 3 years ago

Hey man. Thank you for the heads up - we'll try and get this fixed.